Executive Advises on Letting Go of Guilt When Balancing Work and Family

Many working parents, especially women, grapple with guilt over insufficient time for both work and home responsibilities. A KPMG survey indicates that 43% of working parents experience such guilt, with women reporting it more frequently than men (50% vs. 38%). A C-suite executive at Fast Company, who is also a mother, shares her approach to managing this emotion, advocating for a focus on "disciplined presence" and accepting temporary circumstances.

The executive emphasizes that achieving "balance" between work and family is often an impossible pursuit. Instead, she proposes "disciplined presence," which involves making deliberate choices about who and what receives your attention at any given moment. This can include putting away one's phone during meetings or dinners. She reminds that individuals pursuing demanding careers cannot consistently be 100% present in both spheres simultaneously; it is wise to accept seasonal variations in work and family life.

Furthermore, she advises against measuring oneself by the current moment. Periods when work demands more attention, or times when family needs are paramount, are temporary. Making permanent decisions based on short-term challenges can be detrimental. It is important to recognize these seasons and trust that the situation will rebalance over time.

One of the most crucial pieces of advice is to ask loved ones what they truly need. Often, assumptions about how a parent's time is spent and what a child or partner desires are inaccurate. By focusing on genuinely important moments, such as weekend events or bedtime rituals, one can build more meaningful connections without constant guilt.

Ultimately, the executive states that guilt is a pointless and negative emotion that serves no one. It does not make a family feel more loved nor does it improve work performance. Rather than dwelling on past trade-offs, it is more productive to focus on conscious choices and disciplined presence.